


Near Or Far, You Have My Heart

by rainbow_writer



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Another cliché wedding ending I knew I'd write one day, Arthur Knows About Merlin's Magic (Merlin), Arthur Knows About Morgana's Magic (Merlin), Awesome Gwen (Merlin), Canon Era, Canon Universe, Canon-Typical Violence, Court Sorceress Morgana, Dark Magic, Dragonlord Merlin (Merlin), Dubious Morality, Established Relationship, F/M, Getting Together, Good Mordred (Merlin), Good Morgana (Merlin), Gwen has the one brain cell for them all some days, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Merlin can be a bit scary when Arthur is threatened, Mordred (mentioned) - Freeform, Morgana Knows about Merlin's Magic (Merlin), Multi, Mutual Pining, Not Canon Compliant, POV Multiple, POV Outsider, Pining Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Polyamory, Polyamory Negotiations, Protective Merlin (Merlin), Reconciliation, Sir Leon the Long Suffering sort of, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-07
Updated: 2020-12-07
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:48:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27930046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainbow_writer/pseuds/rainbow_writer
Summary: Arthur is attacked by a rogue sorcerer bent on making him pay. The man places a spell on him, which forces Arthur to relive his worst mistakes.While he lies on the precipice of death, Arthur begs to see Merlin again, if only to apologize for any hurt he had caused the warlock.
Relationships: Gwen/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Gwen/Merlin (Merlin), Gwen/Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Leon/Morgana (Merlin), Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 68
Collections: Merthur Fics





	Near Or Far, You Have My Heart

Sir Leon was on a stroll through the Camelot castle gardens with his betrothed, Court Sorceress Morgana, when Queen Guinevere sought him out. She looked inordinately distraught when she crossed their path, and stopped before the pair. 

The two halted less than a sword’s length in front of her, so as not to collide with her.

“Guinevere, what’s wrong?” Leon asked, at the same time that Morgana said, “Gwen, are you alright?”

“It’s Arthur. He’s just come back from speaking with some of the outlying villages of our Southern border, and he’s injured. Gaius is tending to his wounds right now.”

Morgana gasped beside Leon, and then grasped his right arm tighter. 

“Does Gaius know what the cause of his injuries are?” Leon asked.

Gwen nodded. 

“A rogue sorcerer attacked him, and the party he was with. Sir Mordred was able to disarm the man, but the scoundrel was able to render a great deal of harm towards Arthur, before that occurred.”

Gwen paused, but Sir Leon had known the Queen long enough to suspect that she still had more to say. 

“What is it, Gwen?”

The Queen’s eyes bore into his. Her face was resolute as she said, “I need you to find Merlin, and bring him back to Camelot.”

Leon was a mixture of shocked, and unsurprised at the request, for a number of reasons.

“That could prove difficult, Gwen. He’s not so easily found these days, if my sources are to be believed,” Morgana relayed.

Gwen grimaced.

“I know, but we’ve got to try. Arthur all but begged Gaius to find him, while his wounds were being cleaned.”

“Is he dying?” Leon asked.

If the King was asking for Merlin, then it must be severe. The two had not spoken in years, after a row they had, once Merlin had revealed his magic. Arthur had not taken it well, and Merlin had made it known that he was through with being taken for granted. Only a select few knew the details, but Merlin’s absence had been felt by many ever since.

Gwen closed her eyes, and massaged her temples, before she opened them and glanced at him and Morgana again.

“I’m not sure, but he’s feverish, and has deep cuts all over his body. Gaius swears he can heal him, but I don’t want to take any chances. If Arthur wants Merlin, then it falls to us to make an attempt at finding him.”

The three looked between each other, and Leon felt a resignation overtake him, as he stood there, looking at the two women near him. 

“I will do my best, Gwen, but if Merlin does not wish to be found, he will not be. You’re not the first person to ask this of me, since he’s left.”

Gwen did not seem the least bit surprised by this news. 

“I’m well aware that this will not be easy,” she said, but then tears had sprung to her eyes, and she looked as if she were choking back a sob.

Morgana walked away from Leon, and went forward to embrace her friend.

Gwen laid her head down against Morgana’s chest, and began to cry in earnest. 

Leon wished that Merlin was there so he could smack the man upside the head, and buy him a round at The Rising Sun, at the same time. Arthur was stubborn, but so was Merlin, and his elongated absence had dealt so much pain, that Leon wished the two men would have made up before now, so that it would not continue to cause hurt for Gwen, or anyone else who might miss him in Camelot. There was a list of people, Leon knew. 

“I cannot promise the search will yield results, but I shall try, for everyone who wishes he were here right now.”

Gwen looked up, and nodded. 

“Thank you, Leon. You have no idea how much it means to Arthur, or to me.”

Leon had an inkling of what it meant to Arthur, and Gwen, too. That was not for him to consider though, as he was simply their First Knight, and friend. What they felt, they would need to deal with that, should he find Merlin. He hoped, for the sake of the entirety of Camelot, and his sanity, that if he was able to bring Merlin back, that they would all work it out, though.

“Have we any idea of where he might be?”

Morgana untangled herself from Gwen to face him. Her right arm stayed around Gwen’s waist though, as if she were using it to support the woman in remaining upright.

“According to the whispers amongst the Druids in Camelot, he has been making camp around the Northern border of Nemeth. Queen Mithian allows him safe passage throughout her kingdom.”

“Who would you like me to take on this mission?”

“Sirs Gwaine, Lancelot, and Mordred.”

Leon nodded. 

Mordred had magic, so he could protect them should they come across unfriendly magic users. Gwaine and Lancelot had been Merlin’s closest friends, when he was living in the castle, so that made sense as well.

“Alright. I will gather them, and leave by first light.”

Leon glanced at Morgana, who was looking at him with a loving smile. 

He walked forward then, and Morgana did too. 

As they came close to one another, he wrapped his arms around her, and held her for a moment, then pressed a kiss onto the crown of her head, and also on her forehead. 

Their wedding was not far off, and while they were not the sort of couple to need constant contact or conversation, he had not planned on leaving her so close to their nuptials. It was the price he paid for being a knight, though. His love for his kingdom rivaled that of his love for her, and she understood that, given her own position, too. It had never been an issue between them - their duties to the crown were the unspoken paramours in their relationship, per usual.

When they broke apart, she placed her right hand on his left cheek, and gazed into his eyes, before she said, “I expect you to be coming home alongside him.”

“Of course.”

The two shared a chaste kiss, and then Morgana was at Gwen’s side once more.

Leon bowed to Gwen, then walked away from them so he could do what needed to be done.

* * *

Elsewhere, in a little grotto where blue butterflies flew, and multicolor flowers bloomed, a sorcerer sat by the bank of a stream, looking up at what he had created. A little white dragon was curled up under his left arm, which was partially underneath her head, as it was resting on the hand attached to it. 

The dragon in question was named Aithusa, and she was just a tad larger than a cat one might find prowling around a village like Ealdor, in search of mice. 

Merlin, the aforementioned sorcerer, had tried to be still while she napped, but he had gotten bored. From that idleness, he had spelled a small magic show around them, to keep himself entertained while Aithusa rested. 

The pair had been working hard earlier in the day, trying to strengthen her wings so that she could be allowed to fly away from him for short periods of time on her own. It had been a process, which was taking longer than Merlin had thought it would. He had time and confidence that sooner or later, she would get the hang of it, though. Eventually, they would move on to something more advanced. For the time being, however, he was content to help her gain confidence, and muscles in her wings.

“Merlin,” a voice called.

The owner, a little Druid girl named Celyn, came bounding toward him. 

Merlin held a finger up to his lips, and she quieted down, but still ambled towards him. 

He glanced down at Aithusa, who had opened her eyes to find what had been so loud near her as she slept. 

At the sight of Celyn, Aithusa began to move, and stand up on her feet. The little girl, who was no more than nine summers old, smiled at the dragon. The two were good friends.

Merlin watched the exchange, before returning his attention to Celyn.

Her wildly untamable mahogany hair framed the heart shaped face she carried, while her violet eyes were alight with happiness.

“Do you need something?”

Celyn glanced from Aithusa to him, and her eyes widened. 

“Mother asked for me to fetch you. She said that it was important.”

Merlin did not like the sound of that, not one bit. Celyn’s mother, Eirlys, was a Seer, and a powerful one. The woman herself was kind, but she also could See better than any with her abilities that he had met. It was she who had taught Morgana to control her own powers, at one time. If Eirlys wished to see him immediately, then she had Seen something that could not be ignored. 

Merlin stood up.

“Can I trust you to keep an eye on Aithusa, Celyn?”

He knew that Aithusa would not stray far, and asking Celyn would give the little girl a bit of added confidence, as she was an excellent messenger. 

“Of course,” she said, whilst smiling at Aithusa.

“Thank you. I trust she is in good hands then, while I go visit your mother.”

The little girl was so mesmerized by the mythical beast before her, she lost interest in replying to Merlin. It was just as well. He needed to go find Eirlys, and see what the urgency was all about.

* * *

Back in Camelot, the King wrestled with his pain; both physically and mentally.

Physical pain, he had endured many times before. What his mind tormented him with though, was much worse. 

Visions of Merlin, as well as every other mistake he had ever made in his life, flashed through Arthur’s mind in a loop. The faces of the innocents he had slain under his father’s orders haunted him, as well as Merlin’s last words to him, before he packed his bags and left the citadel for good. A barrage of bad memories continued, and much as Arthur tried, there seemed to be nothing that would stop it. 

Arthur knew he could not rectify the deaths that he had caused, much as he wished he could. Merlin, however, to his knowledge, was alive. There was still time to seek his forgiveness and make amends. At least, if Arthur knew where the man was.

Throughout the night Gaius would rise from his sleep to administer Arthur with tinctures and check the bandages he had wrapped around the lacerations earlier. The dressings were changed, and he was given more medicine. 

The next day, Arthur was still feverish, and asking for Merlin. He vaguely remembered when Gwen and Morgana came to speak with Gaius, and perhaps even him, but the pain he felt took most of his attention. 

Gwen’s lips pressed against his forehead was what he remembered most. It was a brief moment of happiness before the pain took over again. 

Gaius was there with him, at his side, through it all. Arthur was grateful, and made sure at some point to force words aloud that conveyed that, through the anguish. 

Eventually, Arthur was given what he assumed, amidst the haze, was a much more powerful sleeping draught, because he fell asleep at some point, finally.

When he awoke, there was sunlight streaming into the medicinal chambers, and Merlin was wiping a wet cloth across his forehead.

Arthur groaned. 

“Of course I’m not awake.”

The dream Merlin smiled down at him. 

“You are very much awake, Arthur.”

“Don’t lie to me. Merlin hates me. He would not be here, if I were awake.”

“It’s me, clotpole. I’m here, and you are no longer sleeping.”

Arthur’s eyes widened. 

Though he wished to take the man in front of him at his word, he had to be sure.

So, he lifted his hand up, ignoring the pain he felt as he did, and cupped Merlin’s right cheek with it. He was rewarded with a tentative smile in return.

“Merlin?”

His voice was less scratchy with disuse than it had been, moments before. 

“Hello, Arthur.”

Arthur removed his hand, and placed it back on the bed beside him. He felt his cheeks heat up, as he looked away from Merlin. 

The two lapsed into silence, until Arthur dared look back at his former manservant to ask, “Why are you here?”

Merlin glanced down at the ground, then back up at Arthur.

“I was informed about the attack, and your waning condition.”

Arthur’s treacherous heart beat faster, at the thought of Merlin returning for him, and him only.

“Gaius has been treating me. He is quite capable, you know.”

Merlin pursed his lips.

“I have no doubt, but the sort of magic that was used on you, is not something he could lift on his own.”

“The magic used on me?”

Merlin nodded.

“You were cursed to relive your worst failings. It’s a bit of magic that some use to torture information out of others. The sorcerer who cast it though wasn’t after torture, just revenge.”

“You know him?”

“No, but I had a bit of a chat with him, when I arrived.”

Arthur raised an eyebrow.

“Is that so?”

Merlin crossed his arms, and continued to look at the ground.

“Yes, and suffice it to say, he will no longer be a problem.”

“Merlin, what did you do?”

Merlin shrugged.

“I gave him a taste of his own medicine. He’ll be lost in his mind soon, unable to function.”

“That’s -”

Merlin’s eyes snapped up to Arthur’s and it was then that he could see how cold Merlin’s whole face was.

“Justice. I could have killed him, but how would he have learnt his lesson?”

Arthur grimaced, as he was struck by how easily Merlin doled out such information. That would be a conversation for another day, though. 

He supposed that what Merlin had done was better than a public burning. After what Arthur had been through the days before, he was unsure though. Had Merlin not shown up, he would have succumbed to his mind, and that was a road he was glad he had not gone down. 

Rather than exploring that further, Arthur looked back over to Merlin.

“I’ve missed you.”

Merlin sucked on his bottom lip, before he replied, ”Have you? Or have you missed someone to take the piss out of?”

Arthur could only hope that his words would be enough to make Merlin listen; to make him consider staying, rather than leaving.

“No, I have missed your company.”

Merlin wet the cloth again in the bowl that sat beside where Arthur was lying. Then, he began using it to clean off Arthur’s chest. He did not respond immediately. 

Arthur wanted him to, but he figured the fact that the man had shown up at all was a good sign, at least. So, he kept his mouth shut, waiting. 

When Merlin did answer him, it was after he had scrubbed the dried sweat off of Arthur’s upper torso. 

“I didn’t want to leave, but I felt like I had no choice.”

Merlin attempted to scrub Arthur’s shoulders, but the King laid his right hand over Merlin’s left, which stopped him and his endeavor. 

“I’m sorry that I made you feel as if that was your only option. I should have handled it all better.”

Tears pricked to Merlin’s eyes, and he nodded.

“Yeah, you should’ve.”

Both men looked at each other, until Merlin wiped the tears from his face. 

“You should rest. We can talk later.”

“So, you’ll stay?”

The hope in his voice, even Arthur could tell, was evident.

Merlin nodded, his eyes betraying nothing.

“I’ll be around.”

Arthur laid back, and his body fell asleep, again.

It was the first time he slept well in ages. 

* * *

Queen Guinevere clasped her hands in front of her, as she stared at both Merlin and Arthur, who were seated in front of the King’s desk, where she had sat herself. 

“Okay, you two. I’ve had just about enough of your pigheadedness. So, we are going to settle this now. Neither of you are allowed to leave this chamber until we have thoroughly talked this over, and we are all satisfied with the outcome.”

Arthur looked like he had been asked to swallow a fruit basket whole. 

Merlin grimaced; the apprehension was clear on his face.

“Who would like to start?”

The room remained silent in the wake of her question. 

“Alright, I guess it falls to me.” 

Gwen paused, bracing herself for the onslaught of denial and irritation she would feel after, before she said, “I believe you two are in love.”

Arthur’s eyes widened, as did Merlin’s beside him. 

Neither one of them spoke though. There was utter silence following her statement. It was far from what she had expected, so she continued. 

“There are many ways we can go about this, but I’ll have you both know that I care for Merlin, too. Him leaving Camelot broke my heart.”

“Gwen, I’m sorry. I never meant to cause you any grief. I was just angry at Arthur.”

Merlin’s face looked genuinely pained, as he shifted in his seat, before her.

“I’m aware. You were my friend first, though. I wished you had come to talk to me before you just rode off for who knew where.”

Merlin nodded, guilt evident upon his face. 

“I should have let my anger cool before I did anything rash.”

Guinevere waved her right hand in the air. 

“It’s in the past. I’ve made my peace with it.”

Gwen looked away from Merlin to Arthur, who had his arms crossed against his chest.

“What exactly are you proposing, Guinevere?”

It was not an outright condemnation, so she would accept it. 

“Provided you both deal with your feelings, like the adults that you are supposed to be, and Merlin is agreeable to it, I think that I’d like it if we all remained together.”

“Together, how?”

“As you and I have been together on our own, until now.”

Arthur’s eyes were boring into hers, while Merlin was looking at the floor. She could see one of his legs jiggling though, from across the desk. 

Neither man had outright denied her initial statement still, she noticed. 

The silence stretched on. 

Gwen unclasped her hands and reached out one to each man, across the desk. 

Merlin was still looking down, so she said, “Merlin?”

He looked up at her, and his eyes were filled with fear. 

“Can we all agree that not a single person in this room wants to be without the other?”

Arthur took her left hand in his right, and Merlin nodded, then did the same but with her right hand. 

“Good, okay.”

She looked to Arthur, but he had already looked away. 

Gwen watched as all of the love in her heart exploded, when Arthur reached out, and threaded his left hand with Merlin’s right hand. The move startled the latter, who had been pointedly avoiding the King. She observed as the fear drained from Merlin’s eyes, only to be replaced by a soft, warm look. A smile worked its way into his features, as well.

Together, the three of them held each other’s hands, in silence. 

It was not the end of their discussion, but it was at least a start.

* * *

Morgana twirled around in her wedding gown, in front of her full length mirror in her chamber, just to be sure it looked as it should. 

The dress was to Morgana’s liking entirely, as she had it commissioned by Camelot’s dressmaker, fortnights before. It was her first time wearing it though, so she drank in the sight of what it looked like, upon her frame. If nothing else, she was not shy about her fulfilling the claim that she was in fact a little vain.

The garment hugged her body in all of the right places, but was just chaste enough that people would believe she was a bride, rather than a young girl. It had frills at the sleeves, and cascaded down her from waist line, in layers of flowy white fabric. There were of course jewels, as well.

When she was done, Morgana glanced behind her to see Gwen’s mouth agape.

“You look positively radiant, my friend.”

Morgana turned fully to face Gwen, and reached out her hands so that they could clasp Gwen’s own. 

“Thank you, Gwen.”

The two sighed and embraced. 

Morgana’s head fell on Gwen’s shoulder, and she closed her eyes for a moment. 

A part of her life was about to change. 

Morgana would no longer be an unwed maiden. Instead, she would be married to Sir Leon. The two had known each other all their lives, and their courtship had been just what she had wanted. Leon was both her friend, and her lover. He was the dam to her roiling waters. Thankfully with Uther long gone, Arthur had not insisted on her marrying for the good of the kingdom, but for love, instead. She would have given him a piece of her mind, if he had even suggested, but thank the Goddess, it had never come to that.

Likewise, Morgana was the Court Sorceress after all. She had done her duty for Camelot in accepting that position, because oh, did it give her headaches. Given that Merlin was the most powerful sorcerer to ever walk the earth, a small part of her had hoped that he would want the position, once he returned. Alas, he had no interest in any position within the court, so she retained the title. Despite her grousing though, she did love it, for many reasons. 

Morgana lifted her head, and turned for one last look, before walking to her chamber door. 

“As much as I’d like to keep everyone waiting for me, I suppose we should make our way to the Great Hall.”

Gwen stepped forward and placed a hand on Morgana’s left shoulder, while Morgana placed her hand on the door knob.

“Whenever you are ready. This day is about you both as a couple. I’m certain Leon would understand if you required more time.”

“I wish to make him wait the least of all. His life revolves around waiting on myself, or Arthur.”

Gwen nodded.

“Well then let’s get a move on, hm?”

“Thank you for helping me get ready, Gwen. You’re a good friend.”

Gwen smiled brightly.

“There is nowhere else I would rather have been, today.”

The two smiled at each other again, and then Morgana stepped out into the corridor, to make her way towards the impending nuptials. Gwen walked beside her, as was custom, most days. 

Servants were bustling about, but they stepped aside at the sight of the bride, and their Queen. 

Soon, Morgana and Gwen were in front of the big double doors, which opened to reveal the Great Hall filled with guests from all of the Five Kingdoms. At the end, stood Geoffrey, and Leon. 

Her husband-to-be smiled at her, and soon he was all she could see.

**Author's Note:**

> So, this was a thing sitting in Google Docs. Apparently when writing it, I ascribed to the whole less is more policy, so in revising/editing it, I did just that as well. 
> 
> I'm not entirely sure what it is, still, but I enjoyed it enough to post it, so here we are. 
> 
> I hope someone enjoys!


End file.
